Intellectual Disabilities (or PWID)

Please look for new entries every Thursday at the close of day (around 6 pm cst)

Having a child with intellectual disabilities, I have searched high and low for answers and of course, a cure. But there is no cure and truthfully that doesn’t hold the stigma it used to for me. I love my child, she is funny, bright, and a joy to be around, but she struggles with esteem and self worth.

My daughter's adaptive behavior is challenging but improving, slowly. I will share some thoughts on how it has improved and why.  Check with your person with ID to see where their symptoms may overlap with my daughter's and let's look at how to deal with the struggles:

1. Communication

How well does he/she communicate with others. Are they combative, take things too personally? That’s because their communication skills are limited to the most concrete of meanings. Abstract thinking is alien to them. For example, they can’t understand someone saying in jest that they are silly. They take it as something other than humor.

How can we, as caretakers, help our child realize the truth or reality of the statements that are said? My daughter has a job coach that uses abstractions all the time. I gently remind the coach that she needs to speak in concretisms not abstractions.  That in its self will help immeasurably. Think of it this way, if you are listening to someone, their mouth is moving, but you don’t know what they are saying. Very frustrating!  To help, take time to check your words and make them black and white, yes or no, there should be no grays. “Have you washed the tables with the cleaner I gave you earlier, with the sponge I gave you? Did you go back and forth or around? ” not “did you do the tables?"  Give directions one step at a time. In time the chore or direction will be ingrained and then the abstraction will be tolerated. Important fact** when they get it congratulate them so they know they understood the direction." Wow you did a great job." Watch them sparkle!

Having a child with ID is not easy or smooth running, but it is like opening a gift when they get it, and that makes it all worth it. In the next blog, we will be dealing with personal needs and how to help them with that.