Intellectual Disabilities (or PWID)

Being supportive at work

My pwid has challenges but she is very high functioning and she had a job at the age of 17. She worked at a very large facility in their cafeteria. There were a lot of signs that is was going wrong but I did not see it until she was let go. She had a job coach who was very nice but was enabling. I had to intervene much more than I wanted or needed. We certainly need to be supportive of our children but where do we draw the line?

My daughter’s esteem was plummeting when I decided to step in. Some would say finally and some would say not your responsibility. They had management turnover and some of the new people had no empathy for my pwid. She has an extremely high work ethic, and was appreciated for that but chastised for others things. Finally she had 5 ulcers and was a nervous wreck. Thankfully she is out of that situation, but I am not sure she will ever be able to work full time again.

Where do we draw the line, darned if I know? How much should and do we expect from the job coach? Is it reasonable? Are there rules for what to expect for the job coach? Should people with short term memory be expected to remember these rules? What are the answers to these questions? Let’s talk about it. What should you expect from the job coach? Take the time and write down important questions such as what are there implied rules. Are they written down to help your pwid remember them? What should they expect when they are working? If there is a problem at work, what is the job coach responsibility for doing at that  juncture? here are a lot of organizations that have job coaches? Shop around for personalities that are better suited for your child. You are always allowed to switch. It is a job for them, they get paid. You are not tied down to the first one. Shop around this is your child you are talking about. When your pwid gets to the point where they are self-advocating, you can release the reigns. Getting the right job coach will change the whole situation.

Even when you do find the right job coach, you have to constantly work with your pwid to raise her self-esteem and that is not easy. Their confidence is low and they want to hide rather than stir anything up. You need to instruct them on taking care of their selves.  You know you won’t be around forever, so they need to advocate for themselves. They will get there if we let them.