Intellectual Disabilities (or PWID)

Practical skills—activities of daily living (personal care)

“Wash your face, brush your teeth”, does it ever stop? For a caretaker or parent of a pwid probably not. I don’t know about you, but I thought parenting only lasted 18 years or so. HA. My pwid is pretty high functioning, but wasn’t always. The diagnosis was pretty grim. I just stuck to my guns and worked with her. Just remember a diagnosis is NOT written in stone, it is someone’s perception of what the situation appears to be. After months of working on the fine and gross motor skills, we worked on speech and language. After that we worked on communication etc. etc.
etc.

What can we do to impress the seriousness of personal care? In most cases this is the forefront of the diagnosis of cognitive delay or pwid? Where does the disability begin and laziness take over? Hard questions for sure, but they need to be asked. Are we enabling our child or are we encouraging them? Certainly a fine line but the differences can be monumental.

Firstly, the judge needs to be the child. How are they reacting to the directives, with hostility or confusion? Let the child be the barometer. If, in fact, it is hostility, chances are pretty good we need to reassess the tasks we have set before them. They are not difficult enough. We need to challenge our charges and not frustrate them is the golden rule. Sometimes, I believe, we need to frustrate a little. People were very critical of me, but the results were astounding. Her disability rose from moderate to mild. Was I difficult- absolutely? But the proof is in the pudding. Am I also saying that I no longer have to be a parent? No, no I am not, but let me say it is easier.

You can’t just let them take control of their own bodies, the standard most people have is not their standard. The embarrassment level is not well defined here. They forget to do what is expected or they don’t really think it matters. They don’t understand the severity of the tasks set before them.  Don’t try to be their best friend. They need the stability of a strong leader. They need someone who can tell them right from wrong in a firm but kind way. Stay firm and know that when they get frustrated it can be a difficult situation, especially when there is an issue of depression. Hang tough, it will only get better.